The more I write about celebrities the more I realize that the people I dislike are not the famous people themselves but rather those who build them up and tear them down.

Enough of what I dislike. I like breasts. I like big breasts. I like real breasts. I like fake breasts. Those guys who say, “those things are fake”, well, I’m not one of them. I say, “those things are fake? well thanks for making the effort”. I like women who take the time effort and pain to go into a voluntary coma for five hours and have two gaping holes cut into their chest cavity and fill them with bags of an undefined clear liquid for the benefit of male horn-dogs.

One of them was Anna Nicole Smith. I liked Anna Nicole Smith. I thought she was the quintessential sex symbol. I liked that she brazenly used her sexuality (and nothing else) to get money, power, drugs and fame. There was an honesty (albeit twisted) about her. Many other (not all, don’t send letters) women try to couch their grab for money, power etc. in the (quite often fake, once again don’t send letters) fake altruism of love, family and motherhood.

Anna Nicole’s leachy attorney Howard K. Stern is currently fighting a legal battle to block a doctor from selling and distributing a video that shows him performing her boob job. Bravo Howard K. Stern. Seriously. Like I said, I like boobs, fake boobs, girls who get fake boobs and Anna Nicole Smith. However, I don’t want to see the footage of Anna Nicole Smith’s boob job.

Nor should anyone. A tape of it should never have been made.

Anna Nicole Smith was supposedly a hedonistic, drug addled, shallow whore. Yet it is a doctor, a person who no doubt presents himself as a pillar of the community and who took an oath to “do no harm” who not only allegedly secretly taped his surgery but is trying to profit from it.

Why can he expect to be a profit from it? Because there is a market for tapes of celebrities in moments of weakness and compromise. Why? Because most of the “normal” people who sit back and judge the Anna Nicole Smith’s and Brittany Spears’ of the world as whores from the comfort and privacy of their home call them whores not because of a true sense of sexual morality but rather because of a deep seated jealousy of celebrities’ fame, money, and most of all looks.

The millions of people who made themselves feel better by dismissing Ms. Smith as nothing but a brainless whore (but no doubt read every tabloid article about her) surely won’t be able to watch her surgery video because people with such high morals would never partake in morbid voyeurism. Right?

We’ll see.

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