“American Idol” judge Paula Abdul is at it again, denying that her peculiar behavior on the top-rated reality show, as well as countless interviews, has anything to do with drugs or alcohol. She wants fans to believe the only thing she’s been tripping on is her chihuahua, which is about as hard to swallow as, well, her chihuahua.

44-year-old Abdul says she suffers from reflex sympathetic dystrophy (RSD), a rare neurological disorder that causes chronic pain. She told OK! Magazine, “If I appear exhausted on television, it’s because I am! I have a lot of sleepless nights because I’m in so much pain. I try to say something and I stumble, and that’s what people have picked up on. I’m not polished. I’m sick of it. I’ve never been drunk. I don’t do recreational drugs. It’s defamation of character.”

Abdul’s pain problems stem from a cheerleading accident when she was 17, a car accident in 1987 and a plane crash in 1992. “I have four titanium plates in my neck. I’ve had 14 surgeries over the years.

Following a series of particularly dopey-eyed appearances, replete with slurred speech, she spoke out saying, “It was time to set the record straight. I want America to know that I have never been addicted to anything, no chemical dependency, nothing for recreational purposes.” Also saying, “Fatigue and exhaustion just added to the whole thing looking so disoriented. But no alcohol and no drugs, absolutely no.”

She blamed sleepiness, technical problems with audio, misunderstanding and fan resentment, but somehow missed the irony when she said, “I just can’t explain it, but for me, no excuses and no apologies”… except for all the excuses, I guess.

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