In a shameless act of indescribable and unimaginable cruelty, Jessica Simpsons father and manager (the unemployable guy who leeches off his kids and their hard work) was speaking to People Magazine about his daughters offers for movies, remarking that they recently turned down the opportunity for her to play a porn star in a new film.

“The last script that came to us was for Jessica to be a porn star. We were promised we would win an Oscar with that,” Simpson told People. “I was like, ‘Eh, we’ll just buy a [statue of a] little man and keep our clothes on.

Was that necessary? Did you have to take that little dream away from us?

Do any of us go around telling 6 year olds that Santa Claus and his reindeer were shot down by a surface to air missile over New Jersey? Do we go around telling children that cute rabbits like the Easter Bunny can’t lay eggs but make a really great stew? Do we try to convince hippies that guy on the corner actually has no intention of working for food? Do we tell rednecks that NASCAR is for retards?

Of course not.

We leave people alone to hope and dream and believe in the things that make them feel better about themselves and to give them something to enjoy and look forward to in their empty, pointless and unfulfilling lives.

For so many years, we’ve endured the nonsensical babble of this brainless, no talent twit because she is hot. After today, I see no reason to tolerate her at all. As Joe has now forced me to say goodbye to all of my perverted Jessica Simpson fantasies forever, I can’t help but to feel like I’ve lost an old friend.

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